Thanks to the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML) and AFCC for these guidelines for coparenting during the COVID-19 pandemic, which I have adapted slightly for the NZ context:
 
1. BE HEALTHY.
 
Comply with government guidelines and model good behaviour for your children with intensive hand washing, wiping down surfaces and other objects that are frequently touched, and maintaining social distancing. During the lockdown STAY AT HOME. This also means BE INFORMED. Stay in touch with the most reliable media sources and avoid the rumor mill on social media.
 
2. BE MINDFUL.
 
Be honest about the seriousness of the pandemic but maintain a calm attitude and convey to your children your belief that everything will return to normal in time. Avoid making careless comments in front of the children and exposing them to endless media coverage intended for adults. Don’t leave the news on 24/7, for instance. But, at the same time, encourage your children to ask questions and express their concerns and answer them truthfully at a level that is age-appropriate. 
 
3. BE COMPLIANT with court orders and parenting agreements.
 
As much as possible, try to avoid reinventing the wheel despite the unusual circumstances. The care agreement or court order exists to prevent endless haggling over the details of shared care.  
 
4. BE CREATIVE.
 
At the same time, it would be foolish to expect that nothing will change when people are in lockdown. In addition, some parents will have to work extra hours to help deal with the crisis and other parents may be out of work or working reduced hours for a time. Plans will inevitably have to change. Encourage closeness with the parent who is not going to see the child through shared books, movies, games and FaceTime or Skype.
 
5. BE TRANSPARENT.
 
Provide honest information to your co-parent about any suspected or confirmed exposure to the virus, and try to agree on what steps each of you will take to protect the child from exposure. Certainly both parents should be informed at once if the child is exhibiting any possible symptoms of the virus.
 
6. BE GENEROUS.
 
Try to provide makeup time to the parent who missed out, if at all possible. Family law judges expect reasonable accommodations when they can be made and will take seriously concerns raised in later filings about parents who are inflexible in highly unusual circumstances.
 
7. BE UNDERSTANDING.
 
There is no doubt that the pandemic will pose an economic hardship and lead to lost earnings for many, many parents, both those who are paying child support and those who are receiving child support. The parent who is paying should try to provide something, even if it can’t be the full amount. The parent who is receiving payments should try to be accommodating under these challenging and temporary circumstances.
 
Adversity can become an opportunity for parents to come together and focus on what is best for the child. For many children, the strange days of the pandemic will leave vivid memories. It’s important for every child to know and remember that both parents did everything they could to explain what was happening and to keep their child safe.

If you are a separated parent who shares care of your children with the other parent (or where one parent is entitled to contact with the children), how does the Covid-19 lockdown affect you?

The Principal Family Court Judge has issued guidelines as follows:

The overriding consideration is for parents to make decisions that are in the best interests of their children, while at the same time, remembering the reason for this lockdown: to stop the spread of covid-19.

The statement gives advice on when a shared care arrangement should be continued and when a child should stay in one place. In summary:

Generally, children in the same communities can continue to go between their homes, unless:
o the child is unwell. In this case the child should not travel between homes until they are well.
o someone in either home is unwell.
o someone involved (i.e. the child or people in the home they have been in or will go to) has been overseas in the last 14 days, OR has been in close contact with someone who is currently being tested for Covid-19 OR has been in close contact with someone who has the virus or is being tested.

The Family Law Section recommends that the transporting parent carries a copy of the parenting order or parenting agreement with them in the car, in case the police ask you where you are going. Access to an email confirming your arrangements should suffice.

Parents and caregivers should discuss if shared custody arrangements would allow COVID-19 to potentially spread without them being aware and reach an agreement. This may mean the child may stay with one parent/caregiver for the initial 4 week period.

In more complex shared care arrangements, i.e. where day-to-day care is shared between more than two parents, or where one parent lives outside of the same town/city, the child should stay where they are for the four week period.

If your family forms part of a “chain” of households, for example, your children go to their dad’s, and his step-children go to their dad’s, and your step-children go to their mum’s, you need to think carefully about how big that bubble is getting – can you contain the virus? Possibly not. Perhaps someone needs to make a sacrifice so that the chain link is broken and the bubble doesn’t get too big.

If children aren’t able to physically visit a parent, the stay-at-home parent must aside their conflict and be generous with contact via skype/facetime/phone so that the child feels loved and cared for by both parents through this difficult time.

If you having difficulty making arrangements, email me and I will get back to you.